Reed, Erik

Comments by Pat Ward

I know that Wayne and Kevin and all the rest of the family appreciate so much you being here today. It is amazing what God’s people do in times of crisis. Eighteen months ago we were in this very sanctuary celebrating the life of Diana Reed and today we grieve the early loss of Erik, but celebrate that he is at last released from his demons and free.

Kevin, on Monday you received one of those phone calls -- the one none of us wants to get. You had to compose yourself and go and tell your dad what no parent wants to here. Let’s just be real -- life has been unfair to you especially in the last eighteen months. But you have risen up and become a man with wisdom beyond your years.

I said we were going to be real today and we are. So often we soften things up but God’s people need to speak truth and honesty because it is when we do that we don’t have to keep secrets -- it’s when God’s strength is displayed. It is no secret and hasn’t been for a long time that Erik struggled with addiction. Thanks to people like Yolanda, and Tommy, and Michael, we as a group of believers are learning how to better love and understand. Erik had human flaws -- guess what, we all do. We all have our addictions. Erik’s struggle ended his life. Some of you in this room today have a secret...some have a struggle. Don’t keep it to yourself. Get down on your knees and cry out to God. Confess your struggle to someone or to many -- we worry so much about what others think -- we have got to learn today it’s about our life with God and we need to stop worrying what others think. Let this tragedy teach us -- we are as sick as the secrets we keep, that we are going to stop pretending. Erik felt things so deeply. He hurt when you did. He loved loyally, misguidedly sometimes but loyally. He couldn’t stand the pain and so he hid behind his drugs. Don’t we hide too -- behind our money or our status or whatever?

When Erik was in the room, you knew he was there. He had a presence much like Diana. You knew how they felt and what they were thinking. He loved to laugh. He could be so tender and loving when his demons were not in control. We usually talked on Friday nights. I’ve heard him struggle. I’ve listened to him cry and want to change. Wayne, he always wanted to take care of the yard and the pool -- and watch VT sports with you.

Erik was on his own journey to God. He believed in God and confessed that many years ago. He struggled to believe that God really loved him. He kept trying to impress and do it on his own strength -- sound familiar?

Erik loved his mom -- they had a special connection. His dad was his hero and he adored his little brother. I talked with a friend of Erik’s that he’d been living with the last six weeks. He and Erik had been going to church -- they’d had conversations about God. This friend told me that every time they talked, family would come up. He said: Erik was deeply devastated by the loss of his mom. And then he went on to say -- Erik would talk about love for family. Erik might have gotten frustrated with, mad at those of us who worked with him, but this friend assured me that Erik knew when he laid his head on the pillow at night that he was loved by his dad and by his brother and by his Aunt Patty. Wayne and Kevin, I want you to hear that -- you made tough choices in love but Erik knew you loved him. You did all you could and more than you should!

Today we are going to honor and praise God. We are thankful for his mercy and grace. We are going to pray for the strength to endure this time. We are going to confess and be honest and LET HIS GLORY shine. Because we serve a God who walks through the fire with us so we are not consumed and through the waters when we feel they are at the tip of our nose so we won’t drown or be overcome.

Erik we will miss you, but we praise God that you are FREE.

The Thomas Rogers Family